THE YEAR OF A LITTLE BIT COUNTRY
THE YEAR OF I’M NOT SURE WHAT
THE YEAR OF THE BEST HOSTS EVER
What a year. Was there something wrong with the sound system? And the National Selection panels? And the performers? And the songs? The only redeeming feature was Kattis and Anders. What a good job they did. Professional, low-key and wacky in a good way. But someone, anyone, please explain the Olsen Brothers…
THE OFFICIAL TOP THREE
Denmark (there’s those Olsen Brothers. Just don’t get it)
MY TOP THREE
LATVIA. BRAINSTORM. MY STAR
Finally a singer with charisma. And white flares. And a CRAZY look in his eyes. I would go for this even if I didn’t know it was Latvia’s debut. Which it was. But that’s irrelevant. Although it may have something to do with Marie N winning two years later but that’s just speculation. Renārs Kaupers you ARE Eurovision.
Special mention to:
CROATIA. GORAN KARAN. KAD ZASPU ANĐELI
‘And the angels fall asleep.’ Yes, they do. No doubt about it. It’s a pleasant song. Terry Wogan might call it pleasing. But wait. Pleasant? Pleasant? Don’t look now but…
There’s a monster/a force/an Id/an alter-ego/something in a garbage bag, peoples, struggling as only monsters/ forces/Ids/ alter-egos and things in garbage bags can. Oh no! Look out behind you, Goran! No, no, to your left! SPOILER: The ‘thing’ gets out. SPOILER SPOILER: But Goran’s OK. Phew.
CYPRUS. VOICE. NOMIZA
Robotic space suits, alarming silver sleeves , flags unfurling and quite a lot of smoke. I’m guessing Lost in Space. Or Galaxy Quest. Ambitious. Dramatic. Passionate. And they can sing IN KEY. In Greek AND Italian. Mπράβο Alex and Christina!
GERMANY. STEFAN RAAB. WADDE HADDE DUDDE DA
Cowboys in white and gold. Disco. Sort of. Is is Heston Blumenthal with facial hair? Bono in fancy new eyewear? No, it’s German TV personality Stefan Raab who has been to America. And that explains that.
Services to the Colour Green
ESTONIA: Olive green is a brave choice.
Award for Thematic Complexity
ROMANIA: There’s a pan pipe. A little-off key. I want to like it. Is it about to launch into something big? Is it? Is it? Is it..?
Bad Name for a Song Award
UK: ‘Don’t play that song again’. Say no more.